{proof}

Proof that there is genuine goodness in people, that there is such a thing as happiness. Proof that things happen for a reason, that for every action there is a definite reaction. Proof that things matter...that there is beauty and that we choose to see it. Proof that love exists in many, many forms. Proof that there is something more, something so very much more. These are things that I'm thinking, feeling, that I'm seeing, that I'm acknowledging. It seems that after college I was looking for this "life" that would be inspiring, fulfilling, full...and when I didn't find it I was very frustrated and disappointed with the "reality" life presented to me and I found myself disappointed with people, the lack of humanity that I saw, the lack of surface value, hypocrisy I thought. And now, living here, living my life here...I am seeing that there is genuine goodness in people, that people are happy. I am seeing cause and effect every day. Things matter. There is great beauty and it matters. There is SO MUCH MORE. These things are present. In me and in others. Am I just choosing to see it now? Has life seasoned me to the point of being able to see things with more clarity now more so now than before? Is this community a place that we can finally call home? This place feels like what I had envisioned home being. I feel like I can be "me" here and it's okay...that it matters, that I matter, that my interests matter. That my family matters. Don't get me wrong, things are not perfect, things still go wrong. Ethan and I don't always see eye to eye on all things, traffic can be annoying here...there are and always will be issues with school politics. But, somethings different. There is a certain respect. A different value system here that makes all things connected in some way. I'm moved to tears almost daily due to something small but extremely significant. It is so good to be in this place, physically and mentally. -j